Interview Your Doula

This is an article that I came across while taking my Death Doula course. Although this is a newly recognized profession (even though the concept has always been around,) if you live in or near a densely populated city, there may be multiple options for you to consider when looking for a death doula. Even if there is only one or two that serve your area, it is vital that you vibe with your doula. Choose someone who feels comforting and supportive to your needs and concerns, that you feel isn’t judgmental of the choices you or your loved one want. Most doulas offer a free consultation. Make sure they listen to what you have to say pertaining to your or your loved one’s end of life. You as the potential client should be doing at least 80% of the talking. I hope you find these interview points to be educational and helpful and I wish you the best luck in finding your death doula (even if it isn’t me.)

“When you find yourself turning to a Death Doula for support, you may be already carrying the weight of deep sadness and unsure on where to start. The first rule of thumb is – you may ask anything you like! Your circumstances are unique and your individual needs are important. Your Doula will understand this.

However, the following points may help you get started.

1. Enquire about certified training and experience.
   A number of organizations offer quality training with certificates of completion. Currently there is no regulation or national certifying body for Death Doulas. However, most educational organizations self-regulate to a very high standard.

2. Interview more than one Doula.
   It is vital to feel a connection with your Doula. Trust your intuition here. You are passing through an extremely vulnerable time and a feeling of comfort, intimacy, confidence and faith in the people supporting you, including your Doula, is critical to your overall well-being.

3. Enquire about the Doula’s philosophy about death and why they became an End of Life Doula.
   Feel free to ask questions about inspirations, motivations and interests. Doulas have usually attended multiple deaths. Ask about their experiences and impressions. Share what is important to you – e.g. having your wishes carried out, maintaining dignity etc. Share your particular cultural history, and ask your Doula about his/her heritage or background. Ask if your Doula has other qualifications or career paths presently or prior to becoming a Doula.

4. Enquire specifically about what the Doula does and doesn’t offer.
   How do you most often support people dying and their loved ones? What have you noticed is most helpful? Are you available for a vigil? Are you available to attend medical appointments with me? Be prepared for a Doula to ask you specific questions about the progression of your or your loved ones illness, and the support you presently have in place. The reason a Doula may ask these questions is to determine how they may serve you best and make suggestions from there.

5. Enquire about fees.
   This may include questions about time allocated to offered packages. What if I need more time or less time? Do you consult on an hourly basis? How and when can I pay?

6. Enquire about communication.
   How can we contact you? Can we email you with questions or concerns? Are you always on call? Do you offer phone/on-line support as needed? Can we meet to discuss our needs and the role you will play? If you do not have a Doula living in your area, enquire whether the Doula provides phone/on-line support. If you are a caregiver, you can still benefit from expanding your own support network which may include a virtual Doula companion.

7. Enquire about the Doula’s support network.
   Do you have a back-up Doula? Can I meet this person? Do you have support to look after your family and other commitments at times that are critical to me?

Doulas can be hired by people at end of life; however they are very often hired by their loved ones as well. Doulas are there to offer their compassion and skill – and you may be surprised at the strength and confidence you develop in holding yourself as your Doula holds you.”

- Modified from an article written by Maria Lazovic for Australian End of Life Doula Directory
Find the original article here.