How to Start Thinking About the End of Your Life
When it comes to deciding what you want at the end of your life, it can be overwhelming, daunting and incredibly difficult to think about, especially if you’ve been given a diagnosis that is leading you to start thinking about these things. Feeling the myriad of these emotions can lead to shutting down and completely avoiding the conversation altogether. Knowing where to start can help you out. While communicating the physical things and people you want (or don’t want) around you is a large part of vigiling and being comfortable at the end, it is important to think about the actual part of the dying process, as well. Exploring your past experiences with death is a great way to reveal and review how you feel about the situation.
Some questions you may want to think about when it comes to your experiences when reflecting on each death:
What troubled or enlightened you about this death?
How did this death influence your beliefs about how you want to die?
Were there any cultural or religious beliefs involved in this death, and how do you feel about them now?
How did this death affect those close to you, and does that affect how you want them to support you?
Did this death make you realize what elements you may want to incorporate into your death?
When answering these questions, don’t think too much. Freely writing your feelings by yourself or with a death doula may help you realize any fears, beliefs or anticipates in the dying process. I highly suggest not reflecting on these questions with someone close to you, as you may not truly express how you feel or they may influence you in some way, whether they mean to or not.
Talking about dying is never easy. We have cultivated a society that shies away from talking about death and dying, which has only made it more difficult for people to have a good death. Starting the conversation with yourself can help you start the conversation with your loved ones.
Peace and Blessings,
